In case you didn\u2019t catch the story, recently, a group of guys from a YouTube channel called Yes Theory, a channel created by four friends who spend their time doing crazy feats and documenting their experiences, challenged actor Will Smith to bungee jump from a helicopter over the Grand Canyon.<\/p>\n
The reason for such a crazy and dangerous idea, or for any of the activities documented on Yes Theory? In the words of the YouTubers, \u201cLife can be as fulfilling and authentic as you wish so long as you\u2019re willing to seek discomfort.\u201d Basically, growth and good things lie on the other side of your fears. So, if it\u2019s uncomfortable, that could be evidence of a positive outcome.<\/p>\n
Smith\u2019s personal life philosophy resonates with the whole idea of Yes Theory, so he accepted the challenge, planning to jump on his fiftieth birthday. He explained that he doesn\u2019t like being afraid\u2014he\u2019s scared of being scared. Whenever something comes up that makes him afraid, he makes a point of \u201cattacking\u201d that fear. So, when the Yes Theory guys challenged him, and he felt scared, he knew he had to do it.<\/p>\n
In my opinion, bungee jumping out of a helicopter over a 6,000-foot gorge in order to conquer your fear is a little overkill. At the same time, though, Smith\u2019s words hit a nerve in me.<\/p>\n
\u2026since the fall of humanity, many of us live our lives around a \u201cNo<\/i> Theory\u201d rather than a \u201cYes<\/i> Theory.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
Fear is the most primal human emotion, and since the fall of humanity, many of us live our lives around a \u201cNo<\/i> Theory\u201d rather than a \u201cYes<\/i> Theory.\u201d We tend to make decisions based on our desire to avoid what\u2019s bad rather than the desire to pursue what\u2019s good. And it keeps us from really living.<\/p>\n
In professional, recreational, or personal growth settings, we know this mindset isn\u2019t healthy, and we\u2019re inspired by those who deliberately make sure they don\u2019t let fear run the show. That\u2019s why the Yes Theory channel has over two and a half million subscribers.<\/p>\n
Because, on some level, we all want that fearless, risky, spontaneous kind of life.<\/p>\n
Take a look at any self-help section in Barnes and Noble and you can find a whole forest worth of books that promise to give you tools to build your confidence and courage to tackle the things that scare you the most. Spend five seconds on Pinterest and you\u2019ll find tons of hand-lettered inspiration for following your dreams and having an amazing life.<\/p>\n
But as I think back on Smith\u2019s words, what strikes me is that, for some reason, in religious or moral settings, we\u2019re often OK with letting fear call the shots. Our theology is defined by who we\u2019re not supposed to be and who we\u2019re scared of becoming. Negatives versus positives. For years, it didn\u2019t occur to me that this mindset isn\u2019t spiritually sustainable. I thought it was a good thing because it was producing good behavior.<\/p>\n
But it\u2019s not. Life simply becomes a lot of work.<\/p>\n
The day after Smith made his epic jump, I took a walk and started writing down the things that make me uncomfortable. (If you\u2019ve never tried this exercise, I highly recommend it. You\u2019ll feel really pathetic, but the act of writing down the things that scare you somehow gives them less power.) Some felt pretty silly and obviously have kept me from growing.<\/p>\n
For example, I get scared of doing new things in front of people. As a bookworm kind of girl, it\u2019s usually sports and outdoorsy things that make me uncomfortable. Sometimes, if my friends convince me to come on a wilderness adventure, it almost feels like I\u2019ve taken off all my clothes and everyone is looking at me as I start to set up my tent. Feeling naked in public is terrifying, so I tend to stick with the things I know how to do. In the end though, when you live this way, you miss out on discovering things you might love.<\/p>\n
It makes me sad to think of what joyful, life-giving friendships I\u2019ve missed out on because of my own fear-based perceptions.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
After high school, I was very afraid of choosing the wrong career path. For many years I stayed stuck and felt lost. Not making a choice felt safer than making the wrong one, and trying anything new felt too hard and scary.<\/p>\n
I\u2019ve judged and criticized other people because I felt inferior to them and was afraid of what they thought of me. It makes me sad to think of what joyful, life-giving friendships I\u2019ve missed out on because of my own fear-based perceptions.<\/p>\n
Some of my fears though, at first glance, seemed pretty rational, maybe even wise.<\/p>\n
As a child of divorced parents, I made it my goal, while in my teens, to never go through what my parents did. This fear of relational pain made me take that area of my life very seriously, which, obviously, is a good goal. I probably seemed easy to get along with in friendships with both guys and girls and wise for \u201csaving my heart\u201d when it came to dating. But on the flip side, my fear of pain bred a fear of confrontation and intimacy and led me to often internalize my emotions.<\/p>\n
I\u2019ve struggled for years with a fear of God and of losing my salvation. On the one hand, it was good because people were never worried about me getting pregnant, doing drugs, or robbing a bank. They celebrated my good behavior. However, this fear led to obsessing over my every thought and action in a hyper-moral way. I never loved God or knew what it was like to truly rest in Jesus\u2019 salvation. Life was quite torturous much of the time.<\/p>\n
If we let fear be the sole rudder that steers our lives, even fears of legitimately bad things, it will eventually drive us into a prison that, though it might keep us safe from \u201cunrighteousness\u201d for a while, it will also keep us from wholeness.<\/p>\n
The other night I was talking with a friend who, though I know he has his own fears like anyone else, comes off to me as pretty brave. I asked him what helped him get over his own feelings of inferiority and he said, without skipping a beat, \u201cJesus. It might sound cliche, but it\u2019s true. Knowing that I\u2019m known and loved, I just don\u2019t have to care about what other people think.\u201d<\/p>\n
In 1 John 4:16, it says \u201cGod is love.\u201d Then, in verse 18, we read, \u201cThere is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.\u201d<\/p>\n
When we believe the gospel\u2014the good news that God is love and His love saves us\u2014it means fear, as the primary driving force in every area of our lives, is replaced by God\u2019s freedom-based, courageous love, the same love that led Him to take the risk of becoming a human and dying for us.<\/p>\n
God Himself lives by the Yes Theory.<\/p>\n
Open up the Bible and you find that when God reveals Himself to someone, He primarily identifies Himself by who He is and what He does, rather than by who He isn\u2019t and what He doesn\u2019t do.<\/p>\n
Long suffering.<\/p>\n
Just.<\/p>\n
Merciful.<\/p>\n
Afflicted.<\/p>\n
Taking the form of a servant.<\/p>\n
The \u201cI AM.\u201d<\/p>\n
Not<\/i> the \u201cI AM not\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
Ultimately, God defines Himself by His love, and His love is defined by freedom, which means He takes risks. He stepped into scary and uncomfortable places for us, even when He knew everything about us. When Someone loves you that much, it makes you free and fearless. You start making choices based on what is good and beautiful and true instead of what you\u2019re afraid might happen to you.<\/p>\n
Ultimately, God defines Himself by His love, and His love is defined by freedom, which means He takes risks. He stepped into scary and uncomfortable places\u2026<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
So, it turns out the hippies were right. The Beatles were right. The Bible is right. Love is all you need. If you struggle with fear\u2014not just of people, but of anything\u2014look for perfect love. The answer to dealing with our brokenness isn\u2019t avoiding the things we\u2019re afraid of. The answer to dealing with our fears and brokenness is saying yes to good things, namely the person of Jesus. He gives you the power to live by a \u201cYes Theory\u201d and to start stepping into those uncomfortable places so you can experience healing.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s not easy for sure. It feels counterintuitive. But most of the solutions to our problems are. You can stay up all night studying in order to get good grades, but you\u2019ll do better if you make time for play and a solid sleep. You can try to increase productivity by being a slave-driver, but your employees will work harder if they feel supported and cared for. You can try and try and try to be happy, but you\u2019ll actually be happier when you quit trying to be happy and focus on making your life meaningful. And spiritually, you can try and try and try to manage your badness and dysfunction by focusing on avoiding everything you\u2019re afraid you\u2019ll become.<\/p>\n
Or you can start saying yes to Jesus.<\/p>\n
And as you do, you\u2019ll find you can start saying yes to other things too. It doesn\u2019t mean they won\u2019t feel scary. Because some of us have gone for years letting fear call the shots, our bodies and emotions may still react the way they\u2019re used to and freak out. In fact, choosing Jesus\u2019 love and letting that rule every area of your life might even feel a lot like dying.<\/p>\n
But it\u2019s the only way to really live.<\/p>\n
I think that\u2019s why Jesus said if we try to save our lives, we lose them, but if we\u2019re willing to lose our lives, in the end, we find them.<\/p>\n
Here are some good questions to ask yourself: Is my life primarily defined by fear or curiosity and the confidence found in God\u2019s love? As a Christian, do I live in pursuit of good things or in avoidance of bad things? Am I chasing after God because He is beautiful in the extreme? Do I have the values and standards that I have because I\u2019m scared of being punished and I\u2019m trying to keep myself from becoming unrighteous, or because I\u2019m saying yes to the beautiful life God wants to give me?<\/p>\n
Be honest with yourself. If you don\u2019t like your answers, my friend, then it\u2019s time to adopt a Yes Theory and jump with full confidence into God\u2019s love for you.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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