A while ago, some friends and I who were raised going to church were discussing an important question: How can you share Jesus with secular people and not make it\u2014for lack of a better word\u2014weird?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
As a twenty-something living in a post-church world, I resonate with this question on a deep level. Growing up in a fairly conservative Christian family, I knew it was my duty to be a \u201cwitness\u201d for Jesus. But to be brutally honest, <\/strong>the idea of being a witness often felt very weird and brought up a feeling of dread in my stomach, like when my mom made kale for dinner.<\/p>\n\n\n\n For a while, my idea of \u201cwitnessing\u201d consisted of feeling an enormous amount of pressure to strike up conversations with random strangers and either give them a tract or talk about the Bible with little thought of the social environment. I heard people tell stories of what they called \u201cdivine appointments,\u201d where they were able to talk about what they believed with random strangers who were magically receptive and desirous of biblical knowledge. But my own witnessing experiences were not quite so glamorous. They usually felt more like the times I interacted with boys who were interested in dating me: romantic in theory, but highly pressurized and awkward in practice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2026the idea of being a witness often felt very weird and brought up a feeling of dread in my stomach, like when my mom made kale for dinner.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n A guy I met at a Christian youth conference once asked for my number. I gave it to him, but I was nervous. What was I going to say when he called? I hardly knew him. Lucky for me, he asked question after question after question. I gave him answer after answer after answer. Meanwhile though, my brain was trying to multitask, and a desperate inner dialogue was taking place that went something like this:<\/p>\n\n\n\n Me: You can\u2019t let him be the only one asking questions, Anneliese. You need to pull your weight!<\/p>\n\n\n\n Also me: I know. But what do I do? I only have long phone conversations with, like, six people in the world. And, um, yeah, he\u2019s not on the list.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Me: Well, just think of something to ask him. Anything!<\/p>\n\n\n\n Also me:…\u00a0*blinks*…\u00a0Anything?<\/p>\n\n\n\n My subconscious decided that any question was better than no question and soon the opportunity to use my blank check arrived. The guy paused and I heard him swallowing over the phone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cSorry,\u201d he said, \u201cI\u2019m just drinking some water.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n I don\u2019t do well under pressure or with multitasking (or a lot of other things, for that matter). So, with the forethought of a two-year-old, I immediately fired off the most intriguing question my subconscious could think of:<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cOh, are you a big water drinker?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n I might as well have batted my eyelashes and asked, \u201cSo<\/em>\u2026 how often do you breathe?\u201d Not the best way to put my most attractive foot forward.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2026friendship was a means to an end.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n Many, many, many times, trying to talk to people about Jesus has felt like an \u201care you a big water drinker?\u201d moment. In other words, social suicide.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you can\u2019t relate with this feeling, that\u2019s awesome. Go read a different blog post.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But maybe you have felt this way.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I think evangelism often feels weird, not because evangelism is inherently weird, but because we have weird ideas about what it is. I thought evangelism was merely<\/em> getting people to believe the same information I believe. I thought it meant word-vomiting truth onto people with no thought of the social context. It was event and program based: holding a series of nightly meetings where a preacher went through a list of the church\u2019s doctrines to prove them from the Bible, or going door-to-door to hand out pamphlets or books. Once people believed the information and got baptized, you took a deep breath and felt a weight roll off your shoulders. You didn\u2019t have to pay attention to them anymore cause they believed the right things. They\u2019d joined the club.<\/p>\n\n\n\n …the problem with seeing evangelism through this lens is that we\u2019re working against the way God made people.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n I was taught about the importance of building relationships, but it was often still in the context of ways you could get people to believe the same information you did. <\/em>So friendship was a means to an end.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But the problem with seeing evangelism through this lens is that we\u2019re working against the way God made people. The fabric of reality is made of relationships. We crave selfless connections. But anytime you make a relationship with someone else dependent on whether or not they agree with you or you have some sort of agenda, even if it\u2019s to push something true about God, we\u2019re working against what God made. And things get weird. Fast. People start mumbling about how busy they are and bow out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n What\u2019s up with that?<\/em> We say, and bemoan the fact that people are missing out on hearing \u201cthe truth.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The good news is we can avoid a lot of that weirdness, because that\u2019s not what evangelism actually is. I like the way my friend Elise defines evangelism:<\/p>\n\n\n\n Evangelism is sharing Jesus, and Jesus is awesome. So evangelism must be awesome.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If evangelism is sharing Jesus, what was Jesus about? The Bible tells us He came to reveal God\u2019s character. Who is God? \u201cGod is love\u201d (1 John 4:16). How was Jesus going to accomplish this goal? In his book, Mark describes for us Jesus\u2019 main evangelistic strategy. Now, I\u2019m not a pastor or theologian, but I would think that if anyone has got evangelism figured out, it\u2019s Jesus. So check it out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThen He appointed twelve, that they might be with<\/em> Him and that He might send them out to preach\u201d (Mark 3:14).<\/p>\n\n\n\n Hold the phone. Did you catch that?<\/p>\n\n\n\n That they might be with Him.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n *head shake* This is Jesus\u2019<\/em> plan? This is the plan that the Trinity\u2014God who created the layers of the atmosphere, sophisticated cell biology, and complex ecosystems\u2014came up with to save mankind? That feels almost like Steve Jobs deciding the best way to talk to his mom is to send a letter through the pony express. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Out of all the methods God could have used, He landed on friendship?<\/p>\n\n\n\n This might be? is cheesy, but when I picture the Trinity meeting together to figure out the best way to reveal Their character to the world, I imagine Their conversation going something like this.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Jesus: \u201cWell, I can get up on some big hills and in boats and stuff and preach to a bunch of people.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Father: \u201cYeah, that\u2019s good, but we need something else.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Jesus: \u201cI can calm storms.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Holy Spirit: \u201cMmm, sounds comforting.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Out of all the methods God could have used, He landed on friendship?<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n Jesus: \u201cI\u2019ll heal people too.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Father: \u201cUh-huh, uh-huh, what else?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Holy Spirit: \u201cOh! He could do a podcast.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Father: \u201cGood thought, but those won\u2019t be invented for a couple thousand years. Any other ideas?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Jesus: \u201cI\u2019ve got it! I\u2019ll get a dozen or so guys and we\u2019ll hang out for, like, three years. [As my friend Ty says] it\u2019ll be like a hippie commune but without the marijuana.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Father and Holy Spirit in unison: \u201cPerfect!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Maybe it\u2019s an oversimplification, but you get the point.<\/p>\n\n\n\n At the end of the day, Jesus came to show us the Father\u2019s character, which is this mind-blowing selfless love that we don\u2019t find anywhere on our planet. The Trinity itself is a relationship. So it made sense that the best, the most impactful, stickiest way to share who God is would be in a friendship or relationship, loving people purely because that\u2019s what love does. So Jesus put the bulk of His energy into discipleship, which is relationship. He loved, taught, and invested in these 12 guys. They talked, ate, traveled, and did everything together, even though He knew they would eventually all ditch Him and one would even betray Him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n And then those 12 guys \u201cturned the world upside down\u201d (Acts 17:6).<\/p>\n\n\n\n This tells me that when the core of evangelism is relational and based on love instead of mere information, you begin speaking the language of every heart. And it\u2019s not weird at all. In fact, it\u2019s beautiful and makes sense on the deepest level possible.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The ultimate and most appealing form of evangelism is to let a selfless relationship be an end in and of itself, not a means to an end. The best way to teach someone about God\u2019s selfless love is to love them selflessly. I\u2019m not loving them selflessly, though, if I have some sort of schedule that the relationship is dependent on. I can talk about God and His love, but I\u2019m not communicating it very well if, as soon as someone ceases to be a willing receptacle for the information I have to give, I stop caring about them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Bob Goff put it this way: \u201cLoving people means caring without an agenda. As soon as we have an agenda, it\u2019s not love anymore. It\u2019s acting like you care to get someone to do what you want or what you think God wants them to do. Do less of that, and people will see a lot less of you and more of Jesus.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n When the core of evangelism is relational and based on love instead of mere information, you begin speaking the language of every heart. And it\u2019s not weird at all.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n Please<\/em> don\u2019t misunderstand me, though, when I talk about relationships and agendas. I\u2019m not talking about the shallow, selfish friendships of today or aimless socializing. If a modern millennial hang out was all that was needed to save the world, Jesus would have spent three years sipping pi\u00f1a coladas and posting selfies with Bible verse captions on Instagram.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Something is really broken with humanity and Jesus came to fix it. Justice needed to be served and we needed to be saved and learn who God is and Jesus came to do all that, and that\u2019s a whole other blog post. The ultimate point is, though, Jesus changed people by His love. He taught and lived within the framework of relationships and ultimately gave up His life to restore our relationship with God.<\/p>\n\n\n\n And He wants us to do the same. And when you do that, it helps alleviate a lot of awkwardness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cBy this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another\u201d (John 13:35).<\/p>\n\n\n\n So, to get back to the original question, the best way to share Jesus in a non-weird way is to love people. When evangelism is relational, it becomes appealing because love and relationships meet everyone\u2019s deepest desires. Nobody on the planet wants to be a project or used or marketed. We\u2019re not looking to be fixed. We\u2019re looking for connection.<\/p>\n\n\n\n And yet there\u2019s a sense in which sharing Jesus is<\/em> straight up weird. Paul tells us that to some people, \u201cthe message of the cross is foolishness\u201d (1 Corinthians 1:18). Why? Because, in our world, selfless love is weird.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Witnessing for Jesus becomes unnecessarily <\/em>weird, though, when I forget that true, other-centered, doesn\u2019t-expect-anything-in-return love is the point of everything in the Bible. I\u2019m pulling the rug out from under me when I try to manipulate people, even if I\u2019m trying to manipulate them into knowing something true about God. If I communicate that I only want them to know<\/em> something I know, I\u2019m inadvertently sending the message, I\u2019m self-absorbed and just want you to be like me.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n And that\u2019s<\/em> weird.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Sometimes Jesus did do things that were socially awkward. In John 9, there\u2019s a story of a man who was blind from birth and Jesus heals him. He walks up to him and He\u2019s like, \u201cHere, put this mud on your eyes and then go wash it off. Btw, I spit in it.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n I\u2019m pulling the rug out from under me when I try to manipulate people, even if I\u2019m trying to manipulate them into knowing something true about God.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n Talk about weird. If I were blind and some random dude did that to me, I would\u2019ve run to the pool to wash too, but not cause I thought I would see again. Nevertheless, it was a Spirit-led interaction. Sometimes the Spirit will lead us to do things that are strange, but that wasn\u2019t ultimately<\/em> what Jesus was known for.<\/p>\n\n\n\n He was known for love.<\/p>\n\n\n\n And there\u2019s a sense in which we\u2019ll be weird too if we\u2019re loving like Jesus loved.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Because it\u2019s weird to show committed, faithful love to a friend.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s weird to always seek someone else\u2019s highest good.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s weird to empathize with someone when you\u2019d rather prove why you\u2019re correct.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s weird to listen to understand rather than merely waiting to respond and say your opinion.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s weird to practice the love that you preach especially in a religious context.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s weird to be open and vulnerable when everyone else is sarcastic and cool.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s weird to care more about being kind than about winning an argument.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Love is strange and wonderful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But it\u2019s evangelism.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Weirdly enough.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" A while ago, some friends and I who were raised going to church were discussing an important question: How can you share…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":13003,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"content-type":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-13002","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-article"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lightbearers.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/08\/How_Can_I_Share_Jesus_and_Not_Make_It_Weird.jpg?fit=2560%2C1440&ssl=1","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/paAh8r-3nI","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lightbearers.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13002","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lightbearers.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lightbearers.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lightbearers.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lightbearers.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=13002"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lightbearers.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13002\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":13004,"href":"https:\/\/lightbearers.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13002\/revisions\/13004"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lightbearers.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/13003"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lightbearers.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=13002"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lightbearers.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=13002"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lightbearers.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=13002"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}