{"id":14274,"date":"2025-08-08T13:52:36","date_gmt":"2025-08-08T17:52:36","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lightbearers.org\/blog\/?p=14274"},"modified":"2026-03-10T17:53:27","modified_gmt":"2026-03-10T21:53:27","slug":"the-strange-alchemy-of-suffering-god-will-repurpose-your-pain","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lightbearers.org\/blog\/the-strange-alchemy-of-suffering-god-will-repurpose-your-pain\/","title":{"rendered":"The Strange Alchemy of Suffering: God Will Repurpose Your Pain"},"content":{"rendered":"

For a number of years, my mother was in an abusive marriage. That was a really bad thing.<\/span><\/p>\n

Eventually, after being brought to the brink of death, she escaped that relationship. That was a good thing.<\/span><\/p>\n

But raising four kids alone in Los Angeles? That was brutal.<\/span><\/p>\n

So, she moved us to Sacramento\u2014a good thing.<\/span><\/p>\n

I was expelled and had to transfer to a new school. Bad thing.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

But in Sacramento, I became the new kid at school with long hair, no facial hair, and a tendency to wear feminine clothing (because\u2026 LA). I was bullied relentlessly. That was a bad thing.<\/span><\/p>\n

Eventually, I was forced into a fight by a mob of teenagers. I won, not because I was tough but because I was terrified. The other kid ended up hospitalized. That was a really bad thing.<\/span><\/p>\n

I was expelled and had to transfer to a new school. Bad thing. My mom had to buy me an electric bike to get to class. Bad thing\u2014for her. But for me, that was a good thing. It gave me time to think.<\/span><\/p>\n

At the new school, I made new friends\u2014a good thing. But those friends thought it was a good idea to seek revenge on the kids from my old school. Two of them ended up stabbed. Horrible thing.<\/span><\/p>\n

But then I met a girl. That\u2019s always a good thing. Well, not always, but definitely this time.<\/span><\/p>\n

As someone opens up a Bible study guide, they\u2019re holding in their hands something that can be traced back to pain.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Her family was falling apart. Bad thing. She ran away from home to be with me. Bad idea. But her presence in my life? That was good because she introduced me to the glorious secret of the existence of God.<\/span><\/p>\n

Then, my mom got cancer. Really bad thing.<\/span><\/p>\n

And when she died, the pain was so overwhelming I had to do something with it. So, I started writing. At first, the writing wasn\u2019t necessarily good, to put it politely. But it gave me an outlet, which was a good thing.<\/span><\/p>\n

Words became an obsession. And over time, those words led me to start a publishing house that, as of today, has produced more than 762 million gospel publications in over 40 languages. Right now, as you read this, words I\u2019ve written are being distributed by pastors, Bible workers, and evangelists around the world.<\/span><\/p>\n

And as someone opens up a Bible study guide, they\u2019re holding in their hands something that can be traced back to pain.<\/span><\/p>\n

A string of broken, disjointed, and traumatic experiences that somehow\u2014miraculously\u2014led to hope.<\/span><\/p>\n

Every step of the way, God was repurposing my pain.<\/span><\/p>\n

And I believe He\u2019s doing the same for you.<\/span><\/p>\n

The apostle Paul says it like this in Romans 5:3\u20134, \u201cNot only so, but we also <\/span>glory<\/span><\/i> in our sufferings, because we know that suffering <\/span>produces<\/span><\/i> perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope\u201d (own italics added for emphasis).<\/span><\/p>\n

Really, Paul? Can we glory in our sufferings? Do you have any idea about my suffering? Or anyone\u2019s suffering?<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

God is not saying from His cosmic perch, \u201cI want bad things to happen to you, so let me pull some strings.\u201d<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Paul does have an idea about suffering. Suffering, Paul says, strangely enough, is a workshop, if you will, that creates an outcome. Suffering can be productive.<\/span><\/p>\n

Paul is not in any way suggesting that suffering in and of itself is, by its nature, good. What Paul is suggesting is that suffering, which is not good, produces outcomes that, <\/span>if properly understood<\/span><\/i>, we can glory in.<\/span><\/p>\n

Now I am fully aware that I am saying things that are very, <\/span>very<\/span><\/i> difficult for a person who has suffered to wrap their mind around. I, right now, struggle to comprehend these ideas because of my own suffering. I am in no way, and Paul is in no way, making light of suffering.<\/span><\/p>\n

Paul is also not saying that God is the source of our suffering. No, God is not saying from His cosmic perch, \u201cI want bad things to happen to you, so let me pull some strings.\u201d <\/span>God is not the source of my suffering, but He does recycle my suffering into beautiful new things.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

One step removed from the foundational equation of love, freedom, and risk, God knows what He can and can\u2019t do in order to preserve love and freedom. And within that framework, He repurposes our pain into things we never could have seen coming.<\/span><\/p>\n

How does it work?<\/span><\/h2>\n

Viktor Frankl, a Holocaust survivor and psychotherapist, wrote a book titled <\/span>Man\u2019s Search for Meaning <\/span><\/i>based on his horrific experiences in Nazi concentration camps for three years. It is a direct rebuttal to Freud\u2019s claim that life has no meaning. Frankl said, \u201cWhen we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

In the camps, Frankl saw friends and neighbors turn into monsters under pressure. He also saw others become stunningly compassionate, loving, and patient.<\/span><\/p>\n

The conclusion? Suffering doesn\u2019t leave us the same. It\u2019s a crucible, \u201ca place or situation in which concentrated forces interact to cause or influence change or development\u201d (Merriam-Webster).<\/span><\/p>\n

Change occurs under pressure. You\u2019re always in a becoming process. Every moment of your life, you\u2019re morphing\u2014ever so incrementally\u2014into something new.<\/span><\/p>\n

The question is never whether you will change.<\/span><\/p>\n

You can become more empathetic. More sensitive to love. More willing to forgive. Less in need of enemies.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

The question is: How will you be changed?<\/span><\/p>\n

Will suffering harden you? Will it lead you to self-pity, bitterness, addiction to drama, or seclusion from others?<\/span><\/p>\n

Or will it expand your capacity to love?<\/span><\/p>\n

The prophet Isaiah once wrote that God can bring \u201cbeauty from ashes.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

In biblical language, ashes represent grief\u2014deep, unspeakable grief. People would place ashes on their heads to express mourning. And yet, Scripture insists God is in the business of turning ashes into beauty.<\/span><\/p>\n

Pain is the crucible of emotional development. External pressure can lead to internal expansion, if we let it.<\/span><\/p>\n

You can become more empathetic. More sensitive to love. More willing to forgive. Less in need of enemies. You can become someone who\u2019s no longer cynical, no longer bitter, but whose heart is tender and whose eyes tear up at another\u2019s pain.<\/span><\/p>\n

You can become like Jesus.<\/span><\/p>\n

And when you do, your life becomes something new. It becomes something beautiful.<\/span><\/p>\n

In one of my favorite songs, \u201cRedemption\u201d by Dan Haseltine, there\u2019s a line that says:<\/span><\/p>\n

We knew it as a wrong turn<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

We couldn’t know the things we’d gain<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

When we reach the other border<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

We look out way down past the road we came from<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

We’re looking for redemption<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

It was hidden in the landscape<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I believe that one day, we will look back on our lives and realize redemption was hidden in the landscape all along. That bad thing created a set of circumstances for a good thing. The experience that nearly took me down developed a level of sensitivity that allowed me to love people in ways I never could otherwise.<\/span><\/p>\n

You might not have chosen this path, but now you see, you\u2019re not the same person you were.<\/span><\/p>\n

God was and is repurposing your pain, every step of the way.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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